Three guesses.
Ole Miss defensive lineman Terrell Brown is officially listed at 6-foot-10, 377 pounds, quite a few donuts below the 410-pound frame he allegedly brought with him from junior college when he showed up in Oxford last year. Even as myth, that doesn't quite measure up to the Legend of Aaron Gibson at Wisconsin, but it does make Brown the largest active player in the nation, and the unfortunate conflagration of molecules assigned to support his weight don't even bother with the effort. Like a camper under attack by a grizzly bear, it's best to just go limp.
As nationally televised embarrassments go, it's not as remotely as humiliating as having the opposing team start kneeling the clock out with five minutes to go rather than tack on another touchdown. But maybe the Rebels' next coach can spring for more fitting accoutrements?
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Hat tip: Guyism, via Larry Brown.
Matt Hinton is on Facebook and Twitter: Follow him @DrSaturday.
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